This I Believe

I believe that happiness can be found in a new box of crayons. There’s something about that smell, that familiar fresh, crisp wax smell that can be found in the halls of elementary schools, usually mixed with urine and Lysol. Those pristine, untouched boxes represent endless possibilities, new directions, new beginnings. No tips have been broken, no paper labels ripped, no missing colors. Memories, sensations, smells, and tastes from my youth- take me away, if even for a moment, from the humdrum. These memories don’t cost anything, they are God’s gifts. They are tiny bits of joy in a frantic, bitter, and materialistic world.

I was a very “spirited” child- hyper by some standards, but just excited about life. I showed this enthusiasm through shrieks, impromptu dances, and kazoo like noises made from blades of monkey grass. I wanted to touch everything, , taste everything; including crayons. I remember the feel of thick, red Alabama clay, it’s slimy, but coarse texture and how it stained everything it touched. I would rub it all over my arms and watch it dry in the sun and change colors. It reminded me of my burnt sienna crayon from my box of crayolas. I can still see its pale red color under my nails -that were stained all summer. I remember lying in bed at the lake, listening to the cicadas and the soft sounds of the water; a sound that no Sharper Image device can mimic. I melted ice cubes on my chest while humid breezes, that brought no relief from the steamy ,southern ,summer nights, streamed in through the screens.


I’ll try to come back to these moments to remind myself of what can truly bring happiness. I’ll try to remind myself when I’m at the job, working the long hours, earning the miniscule paycheck, to go out and buy the thing that will “make my life complete” or at least improve it. I believe the greatest things in life are smelled, touched, or tasted. I long for those days when I could open up a new box of crayons and appreciate their simple beauty and endless possibility- with nothing left to be desired.

What I know...

This was written by a good friend of mine. He was nice enough to share it. Forgive the punctuation!

I remember the day as if it were yesterday, that day in late November as I sat by my daddy's hospital bed waiting for the fast approaching end of his life. His 84 years had been lived to the fullest. I had always thought he'd out live me. he was always so strong, so enduring. a strange chance of fate delivered him a lethal blow, a simple change of a prescription, that caused a deadly reaction that shut down his lungs. what the enemy in world war 11 couldn't do, what the hepatitis couldn't do, what the ditch cave in couldn't do, what the high voltage wire couldn't do,what even old age couldn't do, a simple change of medicine did in only a few weeks. he went from climbing up in a tree stand at 4am to hunt deer to the intensive care unit in less than 3 weeks. as i stood by his bed holding his large hands i recalled that it was those same hands that i had hung onto when learning to walk, that lifted me so i could climb that tree in the back yard, that pulled the sling shot back for me to shoot at the bottle. It was those same hands that held me up when trying to swim, that threw me into the air so i could make a big slash in the lake. it was even those same hands that swatted my bottom when i had blatantly disobeyed him but only on a few occasions. it was from this man that i learned most about life. i learned if you want friends you have to be a friend, not to just a few but to anyone who needs one, regardless of status or position. i went to church and heard about the golden rule, but it was at home with my dad that i learned what it was to live it. i learned pretense is just so much bull, that sweet tea is to be savored as the delicacy that it is, and that you eat what you kill or give it away, never ,ever waste that which nature provides. i learned that searching for arrow heads and pottery scraps was a way to learn about those whose land we had taken and whose way of life we had destroyed for our own selfish greed. i learned that hard work is necessary if any thing is worthwhile. i learned that holding grudges is just so much wasted energy.forgive, and move on.let them worry about it. i learned what unconditional love was. You don't have to agree, understand and be anywhere on the same page, just accept for who you are, not what you do. i learned that God was so much bigger than even the church folks thought, especially when they were fussing about something silly. God didn't care about such, but did care about how we treated one another. That was the important thing. as i watched the life slip out of his bodyI knew that an era had past., so much of what was right with me was because of him. Ididn't adopt his sometimes salty language, but sometimes wished I had, for it says it better than my college educated words ever do. he was one of those who always knew what his duty was and always did it.bigger than life sometimes, fun, funny, bold, shocking, but always so loving and caring and giving. so much of what i believe about life ,people,honor,duty, compassion and love, i learned from him.especially that life is a glorious adventure, that has to be lived, every day because you never know when a simple change in something as small as a prescription can change everything

Vices

An answer responding to the question of what vices I had planned to cultivate over spring break:

I have an older sister named, Day. Yes, that’s D-A-Y. Clearly, drugs fit in somewhere in my parents’ history…and my brother’s, and my sister’s. My parents have always encouraged me to expand my mind, whether its tagging along on a family trip to a meditation camp in the Virginia mountains or sitting quietly while Daddy hypnotizes me, so I can discover my identity in a past life. My brother found easier ways, through experimentations that left he and his friends sluggish, cranky, and hungry for my precious French bread pizzas. Drugs are a common vice, but too easy, and frankly, unoriginal.
My father’s family so generously threw alcoholism into the gene pool. I have yet to thank them for their gift. Yet, it is unlikely that you will find me deep inside a bottle over the break. I wouldn’t wish that upon even the most hated enemy. I fear that my antics would be inexcusable and unforgivable.
Instead, this break I shall focus on vice in its purest form, the Capital Vices, the Seven Deadly Sins: lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, envy, and pride. Skipping lust, because a lady doesn’t speak of such things, I will engage in most satisfying gluttony. I will over- indulge in every sweet, east of the Mississippi. I will then engage in pride and hit the gym to make my body pay for these indulgences. No doubt wrath will come when my mother voices her disapproval for my shopping habits which I suppose, expose my greed. Sloth will come easily by sleeping the day away and my trip with end with envy of those who don’t have to return to Texas.
To avoid going strait to hell, in the following weeks I will repent by practicing temperance, charity, diligence, forgiveness, kindness, and humility.

Waiting to Be Saved

My parents met in a mental institution. They are psychologists. Sometimes I don’t explain that last part. One would think that I grew up with all kinds of rules and was protected from anything that might damage my fragile young mind. The truth is, I had very few rules growing up. Maybe my parents just gave up because I was the youngest of three. I watched whatever I wanted on television and usually tried to keep up with my much older sister. I feel that tuning into shows geared towards much older audiences had a major effect on my life and how I differ from most 21-year-old girls my age. After all, I completely missed “Saved By The Bell.”
I don’t really know how it happened and I didn’t understand the potential effects at the time. How did I just miss “Saved By The Bell?” I had friends who loved the show, but I just wasn’t interested. When they discussed it at the lunchroom table I suppose I was too involved in my spaghetti. The shows I generally kept up with were “Full House”, “Beverly Hills 90210”, and “Melrose Place”. I liked “Full House” and my sister liked to watch “Beverly Hills 90210.” I hid behind a chair in the TV room so I could stay up and watch “Melrose Place.” This wasn’t exactly a show for third grader eyes.
I am still lost today when “Saved By The Bell” references come up in conversation. I have seen the show on reruns, but never watched it during its original run. Even though I sometimes miss the joke, I pride myself on being different. I have never been one to go along with the crowd. The same phenomenon occurred when “Dawson’s Creek” came on the air. It didn’t hold my interests and everyone else was watching it. So, that was plenty enough reason for me to avoid it. While everyone else was wrapped up in the intense drama of the lives of Dawson and Joey, I was watching Nick-at-Night reruns of the “Wonder Years” or “Welcome Back Kotter.” I was attracted to such a variety of shows, but I always seemed to miss or avoid the mainstream teen drama shows, popular at the time.
My family never really had a show to call its own. We rarely gathered together to watch anything because everyone had sports, ballet, or work. Our schedules were never the same. On the occasional Saturday night, we would tune into “Saturday Night Live.” We all share the same sense of humor, so this was an opportunity to laugh together until we cried. I can still remember some of the sketches we watched together. This was way back when they were actually funny. I must owe Alec Baldwin something for some of those few, but happy times my family gathered around the tube.
Another interesting fact is that I was the only one of the three children who was not allowed to have a TV in my room. I was able to watch whatever and do as I pleased, but not have a TV. The TV did not go with the room’s décor and in Mama’s opinion, spoiled the Victorian chest it was to be placed upon. I was never able lay in bed and fall asleep to the soft rumblings of some late TV personality. I never experienced Saturday morning cartoons in bed. The first time I was able to experience this was in college, and now I don’t even have the time to utilize it. I suppose it could be a good thing that I have the ability to function without the help of “The Today Show” and relax in bed without having to hear Leno’s bad jokes.
Today, I really have very little time for TV. This is a sad, but true fact. I would love to have the time to just sit back and be entertained by the antics of Paula Dean on the Food Network. Her half hour takes me back to the genteel South that I miss so dearly. It comforts me when I am homesick. I also used to look forward to “Grey’s Anatomy” on Thursday night’s, but because of Thursday night class, I can no longer keep up with it. It was the only show, other than cooking shows, that I found interesting. I was also a big fan of “Sex and the City”, but I caught on late in the series and wasn’t able to watch it regularly.
I will probably never be that person who is linked with a particular show when someone tries to describe me. I will never be the girl who is addicted to “Friends” or believes she is in fact, Carrie from “Sex and the City.” I know that realistically, I will be much too busy. I do, however, dream about being the authority on some show; the girl who knows the useless trivia or can give the office an update on what occurred in last week’s episode. It’s too late for me with “Saved by the Bell” though, that bird has flown. There is too much to catch up with and too much trivia to learn. I am still waiting for a show that really grabs me, and one that allows me to keep up with it every week. I am still waiting to be “Saved.”

New Book

My brother-in-law, author Justin Allen, has a new book coming out. Check it out.
http://theoverlookpress.blogspot.com/

Dodge RAM

As I was driving along, I ended up stopping behind a Dodge Ram truck. A familiar site in Texas. As I stared at the back of the truck I realized that "Dodge Ram" is an oxymoron....... DODGE- RAM. I am sure they intended Ram to be used in its noun form, but it is nonetheless an oxymoron..... and it took me 21 years to figure that out.

Planes, Trains, & Automobiles

Oscar nominations came out yesterday... I really can't say that I have seen many of the movies. They just aren't interesting to me. Scorcese and Eastwood just aren't doing it for me. They don't make them like they used to. On that note I would like to pay tribute to John Hughes, the great director of movies like the Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink, and Ferris Bueller's Day Off. What happened to him? The world could use a John Hughes movie.

Here is a great scene from a great Hughes movie.... Planes, Trains, & Automobiles (1987) : the real article.
Steve Martin and John Candy

Carl’s Jr….communist?

Has anyone ever noticed how the fast food chain Carl’s Jr. shares the yellow and red colors of a certain flag and also uses a yellow star as their mascot ? The hamburger hot spot also shares the name with another very famous Karl. Is it just coincidence or is there something more? Let’s just hope that we aren’t all blacklisted one day for buying cheeseburgers.